B” H
The Unsent Letter
Picking up from yesterday’s Erev Purim reflection (from the shelter) about regulation, expansiveness, and what we pull down on these days, I want to make this more concrete.
What I mean by non-negotiable positive habits done in expansiveness is this:
In each dimension of myself, physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual, I have practices. These are acts of self- and soul-giving that help me find my way back to myself. Within each area, some practices are non-negotiable. The rest are there when needed.
Non-negotiable boundaries exist for one of two reasons. Either to protect us from our past, or to nourish us. In the context of positive habits, the non-negotiable is there to nourish the sensitive part within. In my case, that is my emotional world.
In my emotional world, the non-negotiable is the daily 3-page spill. Almost nothing stops me from doing it. Not even a war. The benefits ripple outward. My family sees how much it centers me. They even bought me a plaque: “Warning, Mommy hasn’t journaled. Stay back.”
Everything else falls under expansiveness. Dialogue. Unsent letters. Specific prompts. They are there when they need to step up and help me recalibrate.
And these days are one of those times. I need more to find myself. So I was not surprised when the Unsent Letter felt like the call of the hour today.
“This practice is rooted in what Esther did. When the king’s original decree could not be erased, she was given permission to write a second petition allowing the Jews to defend themselves. From this, we learn that even when something seems sealed, a new petition can still be written.”
On Purim, during these spiritually potent hours, we have the ability to petition Hashem. This connects to the idea of “conscious determination”, that on Purim we can draw down our future, even our immediate future, into the present.” (S.S.)
The practice is simple. Write a letter to Hashem expressing what you are asking for. Place it blindly inside a sefer without looking where you put it. Leave it there until after Purim.”
Unsent Letter Quick Guide
What It Is
• A letter you write but do not send
• A creative journaling tool for emotional release, closure, and clarity
• Can be written to a person, yourself, a part of you, someone who passed away, a group, or Hashem
Why It Works: The 3 C’s
• Catharsis: Safely release anger, grief, fear, hurt
• Completion: Say what was never said, close a loop
• Clarity: No interruption, no defense, just your truth
How To Do It
• Start with a short spill to clear mental clutter
• Choose who or what you are writing to
• Use simple starters like
What I have been afraid to tell you is
I want you to know
If I could say one last thing
Key Rules
• Do not censor
• Be honest
• Let it be messy
• Do not send it
• Reread only if helpful
If anyone is interested in specific prompts to help navigate the food story on Purim, or would like a Soulfood’s Practical Purim Guide, please PM me.
Prompt for today:
If I were to write a counter petition on this Purim, what would I ask Hashem to rewrite in my immediate future?
Purim Sameach!
